Oompah

Some people are just more blessed than others. That's not just talk either, it's the truth. Think about it. There are people who just seem luckier than others aren't there?

I'm glad to see that you've admitted it, because I'm telling you that I am one of those people. I can feel your scepticism through my high-speed cable hookup, but I assure you it's true.

If you still doubt it, let me direct your attention to the snapshot right up there... Yes that is indeed a man with a funny hat playing the hammers. What?! You've never heard of such a thing? Well, it's rare to be sure...but it does happen (pictures never lie). To be honest, I think he's actually playing the anvil with two hammers as opposed to just playing the hammers. Behind him is a band playing oompah music. Mmmm hmm...I was there. I saw it live. Eat your hearts out.

Many people would travel many miles to see such spectacles. I, however, just walked out my door and down the steps and in less than a block I was surrounded by all this wonders. St. Mary's Catholic church is a block away and they're hosting the fine, fun, family festivities.

So far today I have had new tires put on my Jeep, savored a delish Strawberries and Cream frappacino, bought coffee filters and several books, stopped at an Apaloosa horse show, heard oompah music at St. Mary's and chowed down a bratwurst...It's been a lot to fit in and yet I managed...and the night hasn't even started yet.

The Bundesdance

Just one reason German elections are so much cooler than American elections... The Bundesdance which I found a link to on this blog.

On a less funny note, how many Americans know or even care that Germany is about to hold a major election. Not too many I'm guessing. That's how 'Superpowers' stop becoming 'Superpowers.' But that's a whole other post.

It's been three years...

Hey Travelocity Member Services people...remember when I changed my profile three years ago because I moved to Wisconsin?

Yeah well, that should have been an indication that I don't need you to keep sending me emails about the new great fares I can get out of Sacramento anymore. I must admit though, it is pretty tempting to drive for three days to get that $171 round-trip fare from Sacramento to Ft. Lauderdale.

Are you lame enough...

I've been back here in Wisconsin for about three years now and actually spent most of my childhood growing up here. I've made some observations and have - I think - made some unfair stereotypes about many of the people of this state.

One such erroneous stereotype is that Wisconsin drivers suck. They don't actually suck as drivers...they suck as people. Wait...that's not right either. People in Wisconsin simply display a certain degree of lameness that exceeds the lameness of people from most other places and this lameness manifests itself in many ways...like driving.

Here's the thing...Wisconsin is a nice place and offers some nice attractions. This might cause people from other places to want to maybe move here. Unfortunately, many of these people won't be able to muster the reguisite levels of lameness to fit in. In short, they will be miserable.

So, I decided that I should perhaps help prevent that by devising a series of tests that will help people to learn if they are indeed lame enough to live here.

I've split them up so I can dole them out a little a time. Here's the first one:

The above diagram shows an intersection with three cars. The cars are numbered in the order that they arrived at the four-way stop. Cars 1 and 3 will be travelling straight ahead after the stop and car 2 will be turning left onto the cross street. Assuming that no outside forces come into play (ie. monsters, aliens, toppling buildings, pedestrians, etc.), in what order should the cars proceed?

A) 1, 2, 3

B) I don't know...does it matter?

C) Whatever car I'm in should go first.

D) I wouldn't be driving a car...I would be riding a bike to save the environment.

E) What? There are other cars on the road? When did that happen?

Well, the only correct answer here is "A". If you picked "A", you're only going to get mad if yu live here. Trust me on this. If you picked "B", "C", or "E", you are indeed lame enough to live here. Although, if you picked "C", you should really try Chicago...you would likely get along better in Illinois. If you picked "D", you are truly admirable and we respect you for that, but we don't really do crazy shit like that here...you should probably try Oregon.

Wanted...

Since I know there are many others out there who wish to help the RIAA in their quest to keep us safe from the scurge of music piracy... stop laughing... we're being serious here. Um, where was I again? Oh yeah, to help the RIAA out, I have created this fine composite drawing of a dreaded Musical Pirate. (Pretty scary, huh?)

If you see one wandering around, don't - for love of God, please don't - try and apprehend him yourself. Call the RIAA immediately. They're professionals and know how to handle this shit.

By the way, I created this with a licensed copy of Illustrator CS, so don't go trying to turn me in for the reward. I know you were thinkin' it, you scurvy dog...

RIAA... you owe me money

Dear RIAA,

I have noticed the increased efforts you have been making to combat musical pirates from pilfering your coffers. I must applaud your determination. It isn't easy to keep up with all those 14-year-olds with their boundless energy and unfettered internet access. Maybe if more people understood the amount of energy required to sustain such an effort, they would join me in praising instead of vilifying you.

Well, after seeing how hard you've been working, I felt that it was my duty to join in and do my part.

Over the years, I have bought quite a bit of music. Some of it was good and some wasn't quite so excellent. (I fear we've all had our Debbie Gibson moments. Perhaps even you have had one.) Anyway, during the last several decades, I have bought a lot of music and have on occasion played it in my car (first in the form of cassettes and more recently - please bear with my justifiable boasting - in the form of Compact Discs. Yes, I have indeed availed myself of this wonderful technology and have greatly enjoyed the positive impact it has had on my life). I know this isn't unusual and even, I believe, falls under what has been called "fair use" but that isn't why I'm writing you.

Looking back, I remember that during many of these drives with music playing I was not always alone. That too would be fine - of course, you would know better than I the intricacies of the various laws - except that some of my passengers hadn't purchased the same Compact Discs. Thanks to your efforts, I now realize that since my passengers hadn't paid for much of this music we were essentially stealing food from the tables of our favorite artists. I can only plead ignorance and offer to make restitution.

I have spent hours trying to piece together a timeline of my music listening for the past 20 years and have come up with some figures. I have simplified them here for length, but you can give me a call if you want to see the more detailed breakdowns.

Between 1983 and 1986, I spent approximately 10 hours a week in my car with friends. The radio was on roughly two thirds of that time and most of the rest of the time was spent with cassette tapes playing. I've rounded that down to three hours per week since much of that time was spent switching tapes and fast forwarding through lame songs (I'm sure you remember those days). So, at about 15 songs per hour, I should owe you for 8640 songs for that period of time.

I could go on like this for hours, but the rough total of songs I believe I owe you for is a staggering 80,000 songs. I was going to try and collect from my friends (after all, they're really ones that benefited from all this unpaid for listening) but I realized that would be unreasonably difficult for me. Instead, I've decided to settle with you myself. Based on the going rate of $1 a song, I guess I need to pay you $80,000. So, whenever you're in the neighborhood, feel free to stop in, have a beer and pick up that 80 grand.

Your pal,

Shawn

*****

Dear RIAA,

I haven't heard back from you on that $80,000 yet. Is everything okay out there. I know you're really busy working with the FBI and everything (how do you get them to stop worrying about silly terrorists in order to focus on the very serious and real problem of musical pirates?) so I won't bug you too much.

Don't forget I've got a beer for you too.

Your buddy,

Shawn


*****

Dear RIAA,

Oh dear... this is rather embarrassing. I know that I promised to give you $80,000 for times that My friends listened to music in my car without paying for it, but there's a little snag.

As you can imagine, it's not very easy to keep $80,000 around and the cost of storing it can really add up. It's all very complex, but some of this money has been held by me for 20 years now and, unfortunately, I have to charge a storage and handling fee for holding onto it for you. You, of all people, should understand this...

Anyway, (this is where it gets embarrassing) the storage and handling fees have really added up and have far exceeded the amount of money I was saving for you. I'm sorry to say that with interest and late fees calculated in, you actually owe me an additional $17,503.87.

I don't want this to strain our friendship, but if you could just get that to me as soon as possible I would appreciate it. I would hate to have to go to court over this as it would surely detract from your efforts to catch musical pirates.

Sincerely,

Shawn

Live forever?

It's amazing what comes to you late at night. Most of the time I forget to write down all these awesome ideas I get. Not so this time my friends! And what I came up with will startle you! I came up with a way to live forever... That's right... 4ever!

As I was getting eaten by a big ole dino while shooting stuff in a Jurassic Park III arcade game, I was not so quietly telling the machine that it was bullshit to throw a big bastard like that at me so early in the game. (Note that while I was calling bullshit like Robert Novak on a live CNN talk show, I still hung in there and took the hits.) I blinked red and was toast, but I had been through this already once...I had my fresh quarters ready so I could jump right back in the fray.

That's when it came to me. I'm still amazed at how obvious it was. Just sitting there in plain sight the whole time...

The secret to living forever is to always carry around extra quarters.

Beauty, eh?! I don't know why no one thought of this before. I also came up with some suggestions to make living forever easier too.

First, keep the extra quarters in a separate pocket. You don't want to be fumbling around trying to pick the quarters out of a handful of nickels, dimes and lint while your timer is counting down.

Secondly, you should also carry some Chuck-E-Cheese tokens with you too. It would suck to find out you needed to add tokens if you didn't have any. Similarly, you should probably make sure none of your quarters are too out of spec. Wouldn't you hate to see your quarter dropping through the machine because it's too worn out to register?

If you're travelling overseas, you should probably check to see what their arcade games take. Who wants to be thinking, "Oh...if I had only listened to Shawn and kept some Euros in my pocket..." as they check out? Nobody, that's who. Don't be that guy.

If there are two slots side by side, don't use the one that is stuck halfway in. Your coins are just going to drop through. And don't waste time trying to tweak it free...just put the coins in the other slot. Jeez...

And, finally, unless you have an unlimited supply of quarters...don't keep trying to defeat the big dinosaur. Just run to the four wheel drive conveniently parked in the clearing over there. You'll save yourself a lot of aggravation.

***Coming soon...Tips on what to do to pass the time while you're living forever and further suggestions from the upcoming New York Times best-seller and Oprah Book Club selection, "Arcade Life Wisdom: What Your Video Game Is Trying To Teach You."

Tired Poem

Long day
Not over yet
Tired

Reflect...

I was reading a blog called Flogging the Simian and off in the side column she had some interesting stuff. Flogging the Simian is written by a young American woman who is living in Romania. That in itself is pretty interesting to me, but FTS tops that with the fact that it's well written and interesting...

Anyway, in the side column was a simple list. It was just a bunch of names and I don't know how up to date it is, but it the fact it kept going struck me in an emotional way. I copied it and put it here:

Some of the American soldiers who have given their lives in Iraq:

Cpl. Roberto Abad, Sgt. Michael D. Acklin II, Spc. Genaro Acosta, Pfc. Steven Acosta, Capt. James F. Adamouski, Pvt. Algernon Adams, Sgt. Brandon E. Adams, Spc. Clarence Adams III, 1st Lt. Michael R. Adams, Pfc. Michael S. Adams, Lt. Thomas Mullen Adams, Spc. Jamaal R. Addison, Lance Cpl. Patrick R. Adle, Capt. Tristan N. Aitken, Spc. Segun Frederick Akintade, Lance Cpl. Nickalous N. Aldrich, Spc. Ronald D. Allen Jr., Sgt. Glenn R. Allison, Lance Cpl. Michael J. Allred, Capt. Eric L. Allton, Cpl. Nicanor Alvarez, Cpl. Daniel R. Amaya, Pfc. John D. Amos II, Lance Cpl. Brian E. Anderson, Airman 1st Class Carl L. Anderson Jr., Petty Officer 2nd Class Michael C. Anderson, Spc. Michael Andrade, Pfc, Spc. Yoe M. Aneiros, Lance Cpl. Levi T. Angell, Army Spc. Edward J. Anguiano, Chief Warrant Officer Andrew Todd Arnold, Lance Cpl. Alexander S. Arredondo, Spc. Richard Arriaga, Staff Sgt. Jimmy J. Arroyave, Spc. Robert R. Arsiaga, Sgt. Evan Asa Ashcraft, Pfc. Shawn M. Atkins, Maj. Jay Aubin, Capt. Matthew J. August, Lance Cpl. Aaron C. Austin, Spc. Tyanna S. Avery-Fedder, Lance Cpl. Andrew Julian Aviles, Pfc. Eric A. Ayon, Sgt. 1st Class Henry A. Bacon, Sgt. Andrew Joseph Baddick, Staff Sgt. Daniel A. Bader, Staff Sgt. Nathan J. Bailey, Spc. Ronald W. Baker, Spc. Ryan T. Baker, Sgt. Sherwood R. Baker Pfc. Chad E. Bales, 1st Lt. Kenneth Michael Ballard, Maj. Spc. Solomon C. Bangayan, Lt. Col. Dominic R. Baragona, Pfc. Mark A. Barbret, Pfc. Collier E. Barcus, Sgt. Michael C. Barkey, Spc. Jonathan P. Barnes, Command Sgt. Maj. Edward C. Barnhill, Lance Cpl. Aric J. Barr, Sgt. Michael Paul Barrera, Maj. Carlos Barro Ollero, Sgt. Douglas E. Bascom, Spc. Todd M. Bates, Sgt. 1st Class Michael Battles Sr., Gunnery Sgt. Ronald E. Baum, Spc. Alan N. Bean Jr., Spc. Bradley S. Beard, Spc. Beau R. Beaulieu, Capt. Ryan Beaupre, Spc. James L. Beckstrand, Sgt. Gregory A. Belanger, Cpl. Christopher Belchik, Sgt. Aubrey D. Bell, Pfc. Wilfred D. Bellard, Staff Sgt. Joseph P. Bellavia, Sgt. 1st Class William M. Bennett, Spc. Robert T. Benson, 1st Lt. David R. Bernstein, Spc. Joel L. Bertoldie, Staff Sgt. Stephen A. Bertolino Sr., Staff Sgt. Marvin Best, Cpl. Mark A. Bibby, Sgt. Benjamin W. Biskie, Sgt. Michael E. Bitz, Sgt. Jarrod W. Black, Chief Warrant Officer Michael T. Blaise, Capt. Ernesto M. Blanco, Command Sgt. Maj. James D. Blankenbecler, Spc. Joseph M. Blickenstaff, Spc. Nicholas H. Blodgett, Sgt. Trevor A. Blumberg, Lance Cpl. Jeremy L. Bohlman, Gunnery Sgt. Jeffrey E. Bohr Jr., Lance Cpl. Todd J. Bolding, Sgt. Dennis J. Boles, Sgt. 1st Class Craig A. Boling, Petty Officer 3rd Class Doyle W. Bollinger Jr, Sgt. 1st Class Kelly Bolor, Staff Sgt. Stevon A. Booker Chief Warrant Officer Clarence E. Boone, Capt. John J. Boria, Pfc. Rachel K. Bosveld, Spc. Mathew G. Boule, Staff Sgt. Elvis Bourdon, Pvt. 1st Class Samuel R. Bowen, Staff Sgt. Hesley Box Jr., Pvt. Noah L. Boye, Lance Cpl. Aaron Boyles, Spc. Edward W. Brabazon, Cpl. Travis J. Bradach-Nall, Staff Sgt. Kenneth R. Bradley, Staff Sgt. Stacey C. Brandon, Spc. Artimus D. Brassfield, Pfc. Joel K. Brattain, Pfc. Jeffrey F. Braun, Chief Warrant Officer William I. Brennan, Staff Sgt. Steven H. Bridges, Spc. Kyle A. Brinlee, Staff Sgt. Cory W. Brooks, Sgt. Thomas F. Broomhead, Sgt. Andrew W. Brown, Tech. Sgt. Bruce E. Brown, Lance Cpl. Dominic C. Brown, Cpl. Henry L. Brown, Pfc. John E. Brown, Spc. Larry K. Brown, Spc. Lunsford B. Brown II, 1st Lt. Tyler H. Brown, Spc. Philip D. Brown, Pfc. Timmy R. Brown Jr., 1st Lt. Tyler H. Brown, Cpl. Andrew D. Brownfield, Petty Officer 3rd Class Nathan B. Bruckenthal, Lance Cpl. Cedric E. Bruns, 2nd Lt. Todd J. Bryant, Sgt. Ernest G. Bucklew, Spc. Roy Russell Buckley, Pfc. Paul J. Bueche, Lt. Col. Charles H. Buehring, Lance Cpl. Brian Rory Buesing, Sgt. George Edward Buggs, Spc. Joshua I. Bunch, Staff Sgt. Christopher Bunda, Staff Sgt. Michael L. Burbank, Staff Sgt. Richard A. Burdick, Spc. Alan J. Burgess, Lance Cpl. Jeffrey C. Burgess, Pfc. Tamario D. Burkett, Sgt. Travis L. Burkhardt Pfc. David P. Burridge, Pfc. Jesse R. Buryj, Pfc. Charles E. Bush Jr., Pvt. Matthew D. Bush, Pfc. Damian S. Bushart, Sgt. Jacob L. Butler, Capt. Joshua T. Byers, Cpl. Juan C. Cabralbanuelos, Pfc. Cody S. Calavan, Sgt. Juan Calderon Jr, Sgt. Charles T. Caldwell, Spc. Nathaniel A. Caldwell, Staff Sgt. Joseph Camara, Spc. Michael C. Campbell, Sgt. Ryan M. Campbell, Spc. Marvin A. Camposiles, Spc. Isaac Campoy, Spc. Ervin Caradine Jr., Spc. Adolfo C. Carballo, Pfc. Michael M. Carey, Cpl. Richard P. Carl, Pfc. Ryan G. Carlock, Pfc. Benjamin R. Carman, Staff Sgt. Edward W. Carmen, Spc. Jocelyn L. Carrasquillo, Sgt. Frank T. Carvill, Capt. Christopher S. Cash, Spc. Ahmed A. Cason, Pfc. Jose Casanova, Lance Cpl. James A. Casper, Capt. Paul J. Cassidy, Staff Sgt. Roland L. Castro, Sgt. Sean K. Cataudella, Lance Cpl. Steven C. T. Cates, Pfc. Thomas D. Caughman, Staff Sgt. James W. Cawley, Spc. Jessica L. Cawvey, Petty Officer 3rd Class David A. Cedergren, Lance Cpl. Manuel A. Ceniceros, Cpl. Kemaphoom A. Chanawongse, Spc. James A. Chance III, Staff Sgt. William D. Chaney, Chief Warrant Officer Robert William Channell Jr., Spc. Jason K. Chappell, Pfc. Jonathan M. Cheatham, Sgt. Yohjyh L. Chen, Lance Cpl. Marcus M. Cherry, 2nd Lt. Therrel S. Childers, Spc. Andrew F. Chris Staff Sgt. Thomas W. Christensen, Spc. Brett T. Christian, Spc. Arron R. Clark, Staff Sgt. Michael J. Clark, Lance Cpl. Donald J. Cline Jr., Pfc. Christopher R. Cobb, Lance Cpl. Kyle W. Codner, 1st Sgt. Christopher D. Coffin, Pvt. Bradli N. Coleman, Cpl. Gary B. Coleman, 2nd Lt. Benjamin J. Colgan, Sgt. Russell L. Collier, Sgt. 1st Class Gary L. Collins, Lance Cpl. Jonathan W. Collins, Chief Warrant Officer Lawrence S. Colton, Spc. Zeferino E. Colunga, Sgt. Robert E. Colvill, Sgt. Kenneth Conde Jr., Sgt. Timothy M. Conneway, Spc. Steven D. Conover, Capt. Aaron J. Contreras, Lance Cpl. Pedro Contreras, Sgt. Jason Cook, Command Sgt. Major Eric F. Cooke, Sgt. Dennis A. Corral, Chief Warrant Officer Alexander S. Coulter, 2nd Lt. Leonard M. Cowherd, Spc. Gregory A. Cox, Pfc. Ryan R. Cox, Lance Corporal Timothy R. Creager, Sgt. Michael T. Crockett, Staff Sgt. Ricky L. Crockett, Sgt. Brud J. Cronkrite, Lance Cpl. Kyle D. Crowley, Pvt. Rey D. Cuervo, Pfc. Kevin A. Cuming, Spc. Daniel Francis J. Cunningham, Staff Sgt. Darren J. Cunningham, Spc. Carl F. Curran, Cpl. Michael Edward Curtin, Staff Sgt. Christopher E. Cutchall, Pfc. Brian K. Cutter, Pfc. Anthony D. D'Agostino, Spc. Edgar P. Daclan Jr., Capt. Nathan S. Dalley, Lance Cpl. Andrew S. Dang, Spc. Danny B. Daniels II, Pvt. 1st Class Torey J. Dantzler, Pfc. Norman Darling, Capt. Eric B. Das Spc. Shawn M. Davies, Pvt. Brandon L. Davis, Staff Sgt. Craig Davis, Staff Sgt. Donald N. Davis, Spc. Raphael S. Davis, Staff Sgt. Wilbert Davis, Staff Sgt. Jeffrey F. Dayton, Pvt. Jason L. Deibler, Spc. Lauro G. DeLeon Jr., Sgt. Felix M. Delgreco, Sgt. Jacob H. Demand, Staff Sgt. Mike A. Dennie, Spc. Darryl T. Dent, Pfc. Ervin Dervishi, Spc. Daniel A. Desens, Pfc. Michael R. Deuel, Pvt. Michael J. Deutsch, Petty Officer 3rd Class Christopher M. Dickerson, Cpl. Nicholas J. Dieruf, Spc. Jeremiah J. DiGiovanni, Spc. Jeremy M. Dimaranan, Spc. Michael A. Diraimondo, Spc. Anthony J. Dixon, Spc. Ryan E. Doltz, Sgt. Michael E. Dooley, Chief Warrant Officer Patrick D. Dorff, Petty Officer 2nd Class Trace W. Dossett, Lance Cpl. Scott E. Dougherty, 1st Sgt. Robert J. Dowdy, Pfc. Stephen P. Downing II, Spc. Chad H. Drake, Pvt. Jeremy L. Drexler, Cpl. Jason L. Dunham, Staff Sgt. Joe L. Dunigan Jr., Spc. Robert L. DuSang, Spc. William D. Dusenbery, 2nd Lt. Seth J. Dvorin, Petty Officer 2nd Class Jason B. Dwelley, Pfc. Sheldon R. Hawk Eagle, Staff Sgt. Richard S. Eaton Jr., Cpl. Christopher S. Ebert, Sgt. William C. Eckhart, Spc. Marshall L. Edgerton, Pfc. Shawn C. Edwards, Spc. Andrew C. Ehrlich, Sgt. Aaron C. Elandt, Spc. William R. Emanuel IV, Lance Cpl. Mark E. Engel, Spc. Peter G. Enos, Senior Airman Pedro I. Espaillat Jr. Pfc. Analaura Esparza Gutierrez, Sgt. Adam W. Estep, Pvt. Ruben Estrella-Soto, Pfc. David Evans, Cpl. Mark A. Evnin, Pfc. Jeremy Ricardo Ewing, Sgt. Justin L. Eyerly, Pvt. Jonathan I. Falaniko, Sgt. James D. Faulkner, Pfc. Raymond J. Faulstich Jr., Capt. Brian R. Faunce, Capt. Arthur L. Felder, 2nd Lt. Paul M. Felsberg, Spc. Rian C. Ferguson, Master Sgt. Richard L. Ferguson, Master Sgt. George A. Fernandez, Staff Sgt. Clint D. Ferrin, Spc. Jon P. Fettig, Cpl. Tyler R. Fey, Sgt. Jeremy J. Fischer, Sgt. Paul F. Fisher, Lance Cpl. Dustin R. Fitzgerald, Pfc. Jacob S. Fletcher, Spc. Thomas A. Foley III, Sgt. Timothy Folmar, Gunnery Sgt. Elia P. Fontecchio, Spc. Jason C. Ford, Capt. Travis A. Ford, Chief Warrant Officer Wesley C. Fortenberry, Sgt. 1st Class Bradley C. Fox, Spc. Craig S. Frank, Lance Cpl. Phillip E. Frank, Staff Sgt. Bobby C. Franklin, Pvt. Robert L. Frantz, Pvt. Benjamin L. Freeman, Sgt. David T. Friedrich, Spc. Luke P. Frist, Spc. Adam D. Froehlich, Pvt. Kurt R. Frosheiser, Pfc. Nichole M. Frye, Sgt. 1st Class Dan H. Gabrielson, Lance Cpl. Jonathan E. Gadsden, Capt. Richard J. Gannon II, Spc. Tomas Garces, Lance Cpl. Derek L. Gardner, Cpl. Jose A. Garibay, Spc. Joseph M. Garmback Jr., Sgt. Landis W. Garrison, Sgt. Justin W. Garvey, Spc. Israel Garza 1st Sgt. Joe J. Garza, Pfc. Juan Guadalupe Garza Jr, Spc. Christopher D. Gelineau, Lance Cpl. Cory Ryan Guerin, Cpl. Christopher A. Gibson, Pvt. Jonathan L. Gifford, Pvt. Kyle C. Gilbert, Command Sgt. Maj. Cornell W. Gilmore, Petty Officer 3rd Class Ronald A. Ginther, Pfc. Jesse A. Givens, Spc. Michael T. Gleason, Cpl. Todd J. Godwin, 2nd Lt. James Michael Goins, Spc. Christopher A. Golby, Spc. David J. Goldberg, Lance Cpl. Shane L. Goldman, Cpl. Armando Ariel Gonzalez, Lance Cpl. Benjamin R. Gonzalez, Cpl. Jesus A. Gonzalez, Cpl. Jorge Gonzalez, Lance Cpl. Victor A. Gonzalez, Cpl. Bernard G. Gooden, Pfc. Gregory R. Goodrich, Sgt. 1st Class Richard S. Gottfried, Spc. Richard A. Goward, 2nd Lt. Jeffrey C. Graham, Sgt. Jamie A. Gray, Petty Officer 2nd Class Michael J. Gray, Sgt. Tommy L. Gray, Lance Cpl. Torrey L. Gray, Cpl. Jeffrey G. Green, Lt. Col. David S. Greene, Pfc. Devin J. Grella, Spc. Kyle A. Griffin, Staff Sgt. Patrick Lee Griffin Jr., Cpl. Sean R. Grilley, Pvt. Joseph R. Guerrera, Chief Warrant Officer Hans N. Gukeisen, Pfc. Christian D. Gurtner, Lance Cpl. Jose Gutierrez, Pfc. Richard W. Hafer, Staff Sgt. Guy S. Hagy Jr., Spc. Charles G. Haight, Lance Cpl. Michael J. Halal, Pfc. Deryk L. Hallal, Pvt. Jesse M. Halling, Pfc. Andrew Halverson, Chief Warrant Officer Erik A. Halvorsen, Capt. Kimberly N. Hampton, Sgt. Michael S. Hancock Pfc. Fernando B. Hannon, Sgt. Warren S. Hansen, Sgt. James W. Harlan, Sgt. Atanacio Haro Marin, Staff Sgt. William M. Harrell, Sgt. Foster L. Harrington, Pfc. Adam J. Harris, Sgt. Kenneth W. Harris Jr., Pfc. Torry D. Harris, Pfc. Leroy Harris-Kelly, Pfc. John D. Hart, Sgt. Nathaniel Hart, Sgt. 1st Class David A. Hartman, Sgt. Jonathan N. Hartman, Staff Sgt. Stephen C. Hattamer, Staff Sgt. Omer T. Hawkins II, Sgt. Timothy L. Hayslett, Chief Warrant Officer Brian D. Hazelgrove, Sgt. David M. Heath, Spc. Justin W. Hebert, Pfc. Damian L. Heidelberg, Pfc. Raheen Tyson Heighter, Spc. Jeremy M. Heines, Staff Sgt. Brian R. Hellerman, Staff Sgt. Terry W. Hemingway, Cpl. Matthew C. Henderson, 1st Lt. Robert L. Henderson II, Staff Sgt. Kenneth W. Hendrickson, Sgt. Jack T. Hennessy, Spc. Joshua J. Henry, Pfc. Clayton W. Henson, Spc. Armando Hernandez, Spc. Joseph F. Herndon II, Pfc. Edward J. Herrgott, Spc. Jacob B. Herring, Sgt. 1st Class Gregory B. Hicks, Spc. Christopher K. Hill, Spc. Stephen D. Hiller, Sgt. Keicia M. Hines, Pfc. Melissa J. Hobart, Sgt. Nicholas M. Hodson, Sgt. 1st Class James T. Hoffman, Spc. Christopher J. Holland, Staff Sgt. Aaron N. Holleyman, Staff Sgt. Lincoln D. Hollinsaid, Spc. James J. Holmes, Spc. Jeremiah J. Holmes, Cpl. Terry Holmes, Airman 1st Class Antoine J. Holt, Pfc. Sean Horn, Master Sgt. Kelly L. Hornbeck Staff Sgt. Jeremy R. Horton, Capt. Andrew R. Houghton, Lance Cpl Gregory C. Howman, Pfc. Bert E. Hoyer, Spc. Corey A. Hubbell, Pfc. Christopher E. Hudson, 1st Lt. Doyle M. Hufstedler, Staff Sgt. Jamie L. Huggins, Spc. Eric R. Hull, Cpl Barton R. Humlhanz, Lance Cpl. Justin T. Hunt, Spc. Simeon Hunte, 1st Lt. Joshua C. Hurley, Lance Cpl. James B. Huston Jr., Lance Cpl. Seth Huston, Pvt. Nolen R. Hutchings, Pfc. Ray J. Hutchinson, Pfc. Gregory P. Huxley Jr., Spc. Benjamin W. Isenberg, Spc. Craig S. Ivory, Pfc. Leslie D. Jackson, Spc. Morgen N. Jacobs, Chief Warrant Officer Scott Jamar, Cpl. Evan T. James, 2nd Lt. Luke S. James, Spc. William A. Jeffries, Petty Officer 2nd Class Robert B. Jenkins, Sgt. Troy David Jenkins, Spc. Darius T. Jennings, Pfc. Ryan M. Jerabek, Sgt. Linda C. Jimenez, 1st Lt. Oscar Jimenez, Capt. Christopher B. Johnson, Spc. David W. Johnson, Pfc. Howard Johnson II, Spc. John P. Johnson, Pfc. Markus J. Johnson, Spc. Maurice J. Johnson, Hospital Corpsman 3rd Class Michael Vann Johnson Jr., Spc. Nathaniel H. Johnson, Staff Sgt. Paul J. Johnson, Chief Warrant Officer, Pfc. Rayshawn S. Johnson, Pvt. Devon D. Jones, Capt. Gussie M. Jones, Staff Sgt. Raymond E. Jones Jr., Spc. Rodney A. Jones, Lt. Kylan A. Jones- Huffman, Sgt. Curt E. Jordan Jr., Sgt. Jason D. Jordan Staff Sgt. Phillip A. Jordan, Cpl. Forest J. Jostes, Spc. Spencer T. Karol, Spc. Michael G. Karr Jr., Spc. Mark J. Kasecky, 1st Lt. Jeffrey J. Kaylor, Spc. Chad L. Keith, Lance Cpl. Quinn A. Keith, Lance Cpl. Bryan P. Kelly, Cpl. Brian Kennedy, Chief Warrant Officer Kyran E. Kennedy, Staff Sgt. Morgan D. Kennon, 1st Lt. Christopher J. Kenny, Spc. Jonathan R. Kephart, Cpl. Dallas L. Kerns, Chief Warrant Officer Erik C. Kesterson, Capt. Humayun S. M. Khan, Spc. James M. Kiehl, Pt. Jeungjin Na Kim, Staff Sgt. Kevin C. Kimmerly. Spc. Levi B. Kinchen, Staff Sgt. Lester O. Kinney II, Pfc. David M. Kirchhoff, Staff Sgt. Charles A. Kiser, Lance Cpl. Nicholas Brian Kleiboeker, Spc. John K. Klinesmith Jr., Sgt. Floyd G. Knighten Jr., Petty Officer 3rd Class Eric L. Knott, Spc. Joshua L. Knowles, Staff Sgt. Lance J. Koenig, Cpl. Kevin T. Kolm, Pfc. Martin W. Kondor, Chief Warrant Patrick W. Kordsmeier, Capt. Edward J. Korn, Sgt. Bradley S. Korthaus, Cpl. Jakub Henryk Kowalik, Sgt. Elmer C. Krause, Pvt. Dustin L. Kreider, Pfc. Bradley G. Kritzer, Capt. John F. Kurth, Sgt. 1st Class William W. Labadie Jr., Sgt. Joshua S. Ladd, Sgt. Michael V. Lalush, Lance Cpl. Alan Dinh Lam, Spc. Charles R. Lamb, Spc. James I. Lambert III, Pfc. James P. Lambert, Sgt. Jonathan W. Lambert, Capt. Andrew David Lamont, Staff Sgt. Sean G. Landrus, Gunnery Sgt. Shawn A. Lane Pfc. Moises A. Langhorst, Spc. Tracy L. Laramore, Spc. Scott Q. Larson Jr., Chief Warrant Officer Matthew C. Laskowski, Staff Sgt. William T. Latham, Pfc. Karina S. Lau, Cpl. Jeffrey D. Lawrence, Staff Sgt. Mark A. Lawton, Lance Cpl. Travis J. Layfield, Staff Sgt. Rene Ledesma, 2nd Lt. Ryan Leduc, Cpl. Bum R. Lee, Pfc. Ken W. Leisten, Staff Sgt. Jerome Lemon, Spc. Cedric L. Lennon, Pfc. Farad K. Letufuga, Spc. Justin W. Linden, Spc. Roger G. Ling, Spc. Joseph L. Lister, Staff Sgt. Nino D. Livaudais, Sgt. Dale T. Lloyd, Sgt. Daniel J. Londono, Spc. Ryan P. Long, Spc. Zachariah W. Long, Pfc. Duane E. Longstreth, Sgt. Edgar E. Lopez, Lance Cpl. Juan Lopez, Sgt. Richard M. Lord, Staff Sgt. David L. Loyd, Capt. Robert L. Lucero, Pfc. Jason C. Ludiam, Lance Cpl. Jacob R. Lugo, Pfc. Jason N. Lynch, Pfc. Christopher D. Mabry, Lance Cpl. Gregory E. MacDonald, Lance Cpl. Cesar F. Machado-Olmos, Pfc. Vorn J. Mack, Lance Cpl. Joseph B. Maglione, Spc. William J. Maher III, Staff Sgt. Toby W. Mallet, Chief Warrant Officer Ian D. Manuel, Pfc. Pablo Manzano, Pfc. Lyndon A. Marcus Jr., Staff Sgt. Paul C. Mardis Jr., Cpl. Douglas Jose Marencoreyes, Master Sgt. Jude C. Mariano, Spc. James E. Marshall, Sgt. 1st Class John W. Marshall, Pfc. Ryan A. Martin, Staff Sgt. Stephen G. Martin Sgt. Francisco Martinez, Pfc. Francisco A. Martinez Flores, Pfc. Jesse J. Martinez, Spc. Michael A. Martinez, Pfc. Oscar A. Martinez, Spc. Jacob D. Martir, Sgt. Arthur S. Mastrapa, Chief Warrant Officer Johnny Villareal Mata, Lance Cpl. Ramon Mateo, Spc. Clint Richard Matthews, Lance Cpl. Ramon Mateo, Cpl. Matthew E. Matula, Staff Sgt. Donald C. May Jr, Pfc. Joseph P. Mayek, Spc. Patrick R. McCaffrey Sr., Lance Cpl. Joseph C. MacCarthy, Pfc. Ryan M. McCauley, Cpl. Brad P. McCormick, 1st Lt. Erik. S. McCrae, Spc. Donald R. McCune, Spc. Dustin K. McGaugh, Pfc. Holly J. McGeogh, Sgt. Brian D. McGinnis, Spc. Michael A. McGlothin. Petty Officer 2nd Class Scott R. McHugh, Hospitalman Joshua McIntosh, Spc. David M. McKeever, Spc. Eric S. McKinley, Pvt. Robert L. McKinley, Staff Sgt. Don S. McMahan, Sgt. Heath A. McMillin, 1st Lt. Brian M. McPhillips, Cpl. Jesus Martin Antonio Medellin, Spc. Irving Medina, Spc. Kenneth A. Melton, Cpl. Jaygee Meluat, Petty Officer 3rd Class Fernando A. Mendezaceves, Gunnery Sgt. Joseph Menusa, Staff Sgt. Eddie E. Menyweather, Spc. Gil Mercado, Spc. Michael M. Merila, Spc. Christopher A. Merville, Sgt. Daniel K. Methvin, Pfc. Jason M. Meyer, Sgt. Eliu A. Miersandoval, Spc. Michael G. Mihalakis, Pfc. Matthew G. Milczark, Cpl. Jason David Mileo, Pfc. Anthony S. Miller, Pfc. Bruce Miller Jr., Staff Sgt. Frederick L. Miller Jr. Sgt. 1st Class Marvin L. Miller, Sgt. Joseph Minucci II, Sgt. First Class Troy L. Miranda, Spc. George A. Mitchell, Sgt. Keman L. Mitchell, Sgt. Michael W. Mitchell, Spc. Sean R. Mitchell, Pfc. Jesse D. Mizener, Staff Sgt. Jorge A. Molinabautista, Pfc. Anthony W. Monroe, 1st Lt. Adam G. Mooney, Lance Cpl. Jason William Moore, Pfc. Stuart W. Moore, Sgt. Travis A. Moothart, Spc. Jose L. Mora, Sgt. Melvin Y. Mora, Pfc. Michael A. Mora, Master Sgt. Kevin N. Morehead, Capt. Brent L. Morel, Petty Officer 3rd Class David J. Moreno, Sgt. Gerardo Moreno, Spc. Jaime Moreno, Pfc. Luis A. Moreno, Spc. Dennis B. Morgan, Staff Sgt. Richard L. Morgan Jr., Pfc. Geoffery S. Morris, Pfc. Ricky A. Morris Jr., Lance Cpl. Nicholas B. Morrison, Sgt. Shawna M. Morrison, Sgt. Keelan L. Moss, Spc. Clifford L. Moxley Jr., Sgt. Cory R. Mracek, Sgt. Rodney A. Murray, Sgt. Krisna Nachampassak, Spc. Paul T. Nakamura, Spc. Nathan W. Nakis, Pvt. Kenneth A. Nalley, Chief Warrant Officer Christopher G. Nason, Maj. Kevin G. Nave, Spc. Rafael L. Navea, Spc. Charles L. Neeley, Staff Sgt. Paul M. Neff II, Pfc. Gavin L. Neighbor, Spc. Joshua M. Neusche, Cpl. Dominique J. Nicolas, Lance Cpl. Joseph L. Nice, Spc. Isaac Michael Nieves, Lance Cpl. Patrick R. Nixon, Spc. Allen Nolan, Spc. Marcos O. Nolasco Sgt. William J. Normandy, Spc. Joseph C. Norquist, 1st Lt. Leif E. Nott, Staff Sgt. Todd E. Nunes, Spc. David T. Nutt, Cpl. Mick R. Nygardbekowsky, Spc. Donald S. Oak Jr., Pfc. Branden F. Oberleitner, Lance Cpl. Patrick T. O'Day, Spc. Charles E. Odums II, Spc. Ramon C. Ojeda, Cpl. Terry Holmes Ordonez, Cpl. Brian Oliveira, Spc. Justin B. Onwordi, Spc. Richard P. Orengo, Lt. Col. Kim S. Orlando, Lance Cpl. Eric J. Orlowski, 1st Lt. Osbaldo Orozco, Pfc. Cody J. Orr, Staff Sgt. Billy J. Orton, Sgt. Pamela G. Osbourne, Lance Cpl. Deshon E. Otey, Pfc. Kevin C. Ott, Sgt. Michael G. Owen, Lance Cpl. David Edward Owens Jr, Sgt. Fernando Padilla- Ramirez, Pvt. Shawn D. Pahnke, Spc. Gabriel T. Palacios, Capt. Eric T. Paliwoda, 1st Lt. Joshua M. Palmer, Staff Sgt. Dale A. Panchot, Pfc. Daniel R. Parker, Pfc. James D. Parker, Pfc. Kristen Parker, Cpl. Tommy L. Parker Jr., Sgt. Harvey E. Parkerson III, Sgt. David B. Parson, Staff Sgt. Esau G. Patterson Jr., Master Sgt. William L. Payne, Sgt. Michael F. Pedersen, Staff Sgt. Abraham D. Penamedina, Spc. Brian H. Penisten, Sgt. Ross A. Pennanen, Staff Sgt. Gregory V. Pennington, Pfc. Geoffrey Perez, Staff Sgt. Hector R. Perez, Sgt. Joel Perez, Spc. Jose A. Perez III, Pfc. Luis A. Perez, Lance Cpl. Nicholas Perez Spc. Wilfredo Perez Jr., Petty Officer 1st Class Michael J. Pernaselli, Staff Sgt. David S. Perry, Pfc. Charles C. Persing, Staff Sgt. Dustin W. Peters, Spc. Alyssa R. Peterson, Staff Sgt. Brett J. Petriken, Staff Sgt. James L. Pettaway Jr., Staff Sgt. Erickson H. Petty, Pfc. Jerrick M. Petty, Lt. Col. Mark P. Phelan, Pfc. Chance R. Phelps, Sgt. 1st Class Gladimir Philippe, Sgt. Ivory L. Phipps, Capt. Pierre E. Piche, Pfc. Lori Piestewa, Capt. Dennis L. Pintor, Spc. James H. Pirtle, Pfc. Jason T. Poindexter, 2nd Lt. Frederick E. Pokorney Jr., Staff Sgt. Andrew R. Pokorny, Spc. Justin W. Pollard, Spc. Larry E. Polley Jr., Sgt. Darrin K. Potter, Pfc. David L. Potter, Sgt. Christopher S. Potts, Spc. James E. Powell, Lance Cpl. Caleb J. Powers, Cpl. Dean P. Pratt, Pfc. James E. Prevete, Pvt. Kelley S. Prewitt, Sgt. Tyler D. Prewitt, Pfc. James W. Price, 1st Lt. Timothy E. Price, Lance Cpl. Mathew D. Puckett, Sgt. Jaror C. Puello- Coronado, Staff Sgt. Michael B. Quinn, Staff Sgt. Richard P. Ramey, Sgt. Christopher Ramirez, Spc. Eric U. Ramirez, Pfc. William C. Ramirez, Pfc. Christopher Ramos, Spc. Tamarra J. Ramos, Pfc. Brandon Ramsey, Pvt. Carson J. Ramsey, Sgt. Edmond L. Randle, Pfc. Cleston C. Raney, Capt. Gregory A. Ratzlaff, Spc. Rel A. Ravago IV, Spc. Omead H. Razani Spc. Brandon M. Read, Pfc. Christopher J. Reed, Pfc. Ryan E. Reed, Sgt. Tatjana Reed, Staff Sgt. Aaron T. Reese, Spc. Jeremy F. Regnier, Sgt. 1st Class Randall S. Rehn, Sgt. Brendon C. Reiss, Staff Sgt. George S. Rentschler, Sgt. Sean C. Reynolds, Lance Cpl. Rafael Reynosa- Suarez, Sgt. Yadir G. Reynoso, Cpl. Demetrius L. Rice, Sgt. Ariel Rico, Spc. Jeremy L. Ridlen, Pfc. Diego Fernando Rincon, Cpl. Steven A. Rintamaki, Sgt. Duane R. Rios, Capt. Russell B. Rippetoe, Pfc. Henry C. Risner, Sgt. 1st Class Jose A. Rivera, Cpl. John T. Rivero, Spc. Frank K. Rivers Jr., Sgt. Thomas D. Robbins, Sgt. Todd J. Robbins, Lance Cpl. Anthony P. Roberts, Lance Cpl. Bob W. Roberts, Spc. Robert D. Roberts, Staff Sgt. Joseph E. Robsky, Sgt. Moses D. Rocha, Pfc. Marlin T. Rockhold, Pfc. Jose Francis Gonzalez Rodriguez, Cpl. Robert M. Rodriguez, Spc. Philip G. Rogers, Sgt. 1st Class Robert E. Rooney, Cpl. Randal Kent Rosacker, Staff Sgt. Victor A. Rosales, Pfc. Richard H. Rosas, Sgt. Scott C. Rose, Sgt. Thomas C. Rosenbaum, Sgt. Randy S. Rosenberg, Spc. Marco D. Ross, Sgt. Lawrence A. Roukey, Capt. Alan Rowe, Spc. Brandon J. Rowe, Sgt. Roger D. Rowe, 2nd Lt. Jonathan D. Rozier, Spc. Isela Rubalcava, Pfc. Aaron J. Rusin, Sgt. John W. Russell 1st Lt. Timothy Louis Ryan, Chief Warrant Officer Scott A. Saboe, Spc. Rasheed Sahib, Cpl. Rudy Salas, Cpl. William I. Salazar, 1st Lt. Edward M. Saltz, Capt. Benjamin W. Sammis, Spc. Sonny G. Sampler, Spc. Gregory P. Sanders, Pfc. Leroy Sandoval Jr., Spc. Matthew J. Sandri, Staff Sgt. Barry Sanford, 1st Lt. Neil Anthony Santoriello, Spc. Jonathan J. Santos, Pfc. Brandon R. Sapp, Staff Sgt. Cameron B. Sarno, Staff Sgt. Scott D. Sather, Lance Cpl. Jeremiah E. Savage, Capt. Robert C. Scheetz Jr., Spc. Justin B. Schmidt, Spc. Jeremiah W. Schmunk, Pfc. Sean M. Schneider, Cpl. Dustin H. Schrage, Maj. Mathew E. Schram, Lance Cpl. Brian K. Schramm, Spc. Christian C. Schulz, Master Sgt. David A. Scott, Pfc. Kerry D. Scott, Spc. Stephen M. Scott, Spc. Marc S. Seiden, Capt. Christopher Scott Seifert, Pfc. Dustin M. Sekula, Lance Cpl. Matthew K. Serio, Sgt. Juan M. Serrano, Staff Sgt. Wentz Jerome Henry Shanaberger III, Spc. Jeffrey R. Shaver, Maj. Kevin M. Shea, Spc. Casey Sheehan, Sgt. Kevin F. Sheehan, Sgt. Daniel Michael Shepherd, Sgt. Alan D. Sherman, Lt. Col. Anthony L. Sherman, Pfc. Harry N. Shondee Jr., Lance Cpl. Brad S. Shuder, Capt. James A. Shull, Pfc. Kenneth L. Sickels, Lance Cpl. Dustin L. Sides, Cpl. Erik H. Silva, Pvt. Sean A. Silva, Sgt. Leonard D. Simmons Pfc. Charles M. Sims, Lance Cpl. John T. Sims Jr., Spc. Uday Singh, Spc. Aaron J. Sissel, Pfc. Christopher A. Sisson, Pfc. Nicholas M. Skinner, Petty Officer 3rd Class David Sisung, 1st Lt. Brian D. Slavenas, Pvt. Brandon Ulysses Sloan, Lance Cpl. Richard P. Slocum, Lance Cpl. Thomas J. Slocum, Pfc. Corey L. Small, Sgt. Keith L. Smette, Capt. Benedict J. Smith, Sgt. Benjamin K. Smith, Pfc. Brandon C. Smith, 2nd Lt. Brian D. Smith, Chief Warrant Officer Bruce A. Smith, Cpl. Darrell L. Smith, 1st Sgt. Edward Smith, Chief Warrant Officer Eric A. Smith, Pfc. Jeremiah D. Smith, Lance Cpl. Matthew R. Smith, Lance Cpl. Michael J. Smith Jr., Spc. Orenthial J. Smith, Sgt. 1st Class Paul R. Smith, Capt. Christopher F. Soelzer, Sgt. Roderic A. Solomon, Cpl. Adrian V. Soltau, Maj. Charles R. Soltes Jr., Sgt. Skipper Soram, Pfc. Armando Soriano, Cpl. Tomas Sotelo Jr., Pfc. Kenneth C. Souslin, Spc. Philip I. Spakosky, Pfc. Jason L. Sparks, Cpl. Michael R. Speer, Staff Sgt. Trevor Spink, Maj. Christopher J. Splinter, Sgt. Marvin R. Sprayberry III, Pvt. Bryan N. Spry, Sgt. Maj. Michael B. Stack, Pfc. Nathan E. Stahl, 1st Lt. Andrew K. Stern, Staff Sgt. Robert A. Stever, Maj. Gregory Stone, 2nd Lt. Matthew R. Stovall, Pfc. William R. Strange, Sgt. Kirk Allen Straseskie, Pfc. Brandon C. Sturdy Spc. William R. Sturges Jr., Spc. Paul J. Sturino, Lance Cpl. Jesus A. Suarez Del Solar, Spc. Joseph D. Suell, Spc. John R. Sullivan, Spc. Narson B. Sullivan, Lance Cpl. Vincent M. Sullivan, Staff Sgt. Michael J. Sutter, Pfc. Ernest Harold Sutphin, Chief Warrant Officer Sharon T. Swartworth, Spc. Thomas J. Sweet II, Staff Sgt. Christopher W. Swisher, Maj. Paul R. Syverson III, Sgt. Patrick S. Tainsh, Sgt. DeForest L. Talbert, Sgt. 1st Class Linda Ann Tarango-Griess, Spc. Christopher M. Taylor, Maj. Mark D. Taylor, Capt. John R. Teal, Staff Sgt. Riayan A. Tejeda, Lance Cpl. Jason Andrew Tetrault, Spc. Joseph C. Thibodeaux, Master Sgt. Thomas R. Thigpen Sr., Cpl. Jesse L. Thiry, Sgt. Carl Thomas, Staff Sgt. Kendall Thomas, Spc. Kyle G. Thomas, Sgt. Anthony O. Thompson, Spc. Jarrett B. Thompson, Sgt. Humberto F. Timoteo, Capt. John E. Tipton, Pfc. Joshua K. Titcomb, Spc. Brandon T. Titus, Spc. Brandon S. Tobler, Sgt. Lee D. TodacheeneCpl. John H. Todd III, Sgt. Nicholas A. Tomko, Master Sgt. Timothy Toney, Pfc. George D. Torres, Lance Cpl. Michael S. Torres, 2nd Lt. Richard Torres, Spc. Ramon Reyes Torres, Lance Cpl. Elias Torrez III, Sgt. Michael L. Tosto, Spc. Richard K. Trevithick, Pfc. Andrew L. Tuazon, Staff Sgt. Roger C. Turner Jr., Pvt. Scott M. Tyrrell, 2nd Lt. Andre D. Tyson, Spc. Eugene A. Uhl III, Lance Cpl. Drew M. Uhles Rick A. Ulbright, Pfc. Daniel P. Unger, Spc. Robert Oliver Unruh, 1st Sgt. Ernest E. Utt, Sgt. Michael A. Uvanni, Staff Sgt. Gary A. Vaillant, Lance Cpl. Ruben Valdez Jr., Sgt. Melissa Valles, Spc. Allen J. Vandayburg, Spc. Josiah H. Vandertulip, Chief Warrant Officer Brian K. Van Dusen, Lance Cpl. John J. Vangyzen IV, Lance Cpl. Gary F. Van Leuven, Staff Sgt. Mark D. Vasquez, Spc. Frances M. Vega, 1st Lt. Michael W. Vega, Staff Sgt. Paul A. Velazquez, Cpl. David M. Vicente, Sgt. 1st Class Joselito O. Villanueva, Cpl. Scott M. Vincent, Staff Sgt. Kimberly A. Voelz, Staff Sgt. Michael S. Voss, Spc. Thai Vue, Lance Cpl. Michael B. Wafford, Sgt. Christopher A. Wagener, Sgt. Gregory L. Wahl, Staff Sgt. Allan K. Walker, Sgt. Jeffery C. Walker, Sgt. Donald Ralph Walters, Pvt. Jason M. Ward, Pfc. Nachez Washalanta, Lance Cpl. Christopher B. Wasser, Pvt. David L. Waters, Staff Sgt. Kendall Damon Waters-Bey, Maj. William R. Watkins III, Petty Officer 2nd Class Christopher E. Watts, Chief Warrant Officer Aaron A. Weaver, Spc. Michael S. Weger, Staff Sgt. David J. Weisenburg, Spc. Douglas J. Weismantle, Pfc. Michael Russell Creighton Weldon, Lance Cpl. Larry L. Wells, Chief Warrant Officer Stephen M. Wells, Spc. Jeffrey M. Wershow, Spc. Christopher J. Rivera Wesley, Sgt. James G. West, 1st Lt. Alexander E. Wetherbee, Spc. Donald L. Wheeler, Sgt. Mason Douglas Whetstone, Pfc. Marquis A. Whitaker Staff Sgt. Aaron Dean White, Lt. Nathan D. White, Sgt. Steven W. White, Lance Cpl. William W. White, Pfc. Joey D. Whitener ,Spc. Chase R. Whitman, Spc. Michael J. Wiesemann, Cpl. Joshua S. Wilfong ,Sgt. Eugene Williams, Lance Cpl. Michael J. Williams, Spc. Michael L. Williams, Sgt. Taft V. Williams ,1st Lt. Charles L. Wilkins III, Sgt. 1st Class Christopher R. Willoughby, Spc. Dana N. Wilson, Command Sgt. Maj. Jerry L. Wilson, Staff Sgt. Joe N. Wilson, Lance Cpl. Lamont N. Wilson, Lance Cpl. Nicholas Wilt, 1st Lt. Ronald Winchester, Spc. Trevor A. Wine, Lance Cpl. William J. Wiscowiche, Spc. Robert A. Wise, Spc. Michelle M. Witmer, Pfc. Owen D. Witt, Spc. James R. Wolf, 2nd Lt. Jeremy L. Wolfe, Sgt. Elijah Tai Wah Wong, Sgt. Brian M. Wood, Capt. George A. Wood, Spc. Michael R. Woodliff, Spc. James C. Wright, Pfc. Jason G. Wright, 2nd Lt. John T. Wroblewski, Lance Cpl. Daniel R. Wyatt, Pfc. Stephen E. Wyatt, Sgt. Michael E. Yashinski, Sgt. Henry Ybarra III, Pfc. Rodricka A. Youmans, Sgt. Ryan C. Young, Lance Cpl. Andrew J. Zabierek, Spc. Nicholas J. Zangara, Spc. Mark Anthony Zapata, Pfc. Nicholaus E. Zimmer, Cpl. Ian T. Zook, Lance Cpl. Robert P. Zurheide Jr.

May they all Rest In Peace

Novak flips the **** out

Usually, you don't get to see people who make careers out of being dicks finally get theirs. Even more rarely do you get to see it live on national television.

So, Robert Novak, after years of giving real newsmen a bad name with your pseudo-journalism, I'm glad to see you flip the fuck out on CNN.

I wish I could say I feel sorry for you, but alas you are an ass...

Now, if I could only see James Carvell make Karl Rove flip out, I would be a happy little camper.

Cowboys are cool...

I've got thing for cowboys. I covered rodeos for several years, I can't help it.

It all started with a freelance job. I had done a couple of magazine pieces and was trying to do more. I found a publication called ProRodeo Sports News and called them up. I told them I could cover a rodeo just up the road for them. They asked if I knew anything about rodeo and I lied. I got the job.

The Sisters Rodeo (The Biggest Little Show in the West) was my first rodeo and I was going to write about it for what turned out to be the Sports Illustrated of the Rodeo World. Thankfully, I didn't know that it was a big stink publication in the rodeo world at the time.

Basically, my knowledge of rodeo was that if it was trying to buck you off, you were supposed to stay on and if it was running away from you, you were supposed to catch it... humble beginnings indeed.

I met a lady in the contestant's area and we started talking. She explained some things to me and then said I should talk to her nephews...apparently they knew a bit about the sport. I grudgingly accepted her invitation thinking it would only take a couple of minutes and then I could get back to the real job of covering this event. Well, She introduced me to her nephews. One was a multi-time world champion bronc rider and his younger brother was on his way to winning his own world championship gold buckle that very year. These cowboys, Marvin and Mark Garrett, were a couple of the nicest, down-to-earth guys I've met. They took the time to explain the sport and gave me some pretty durn good quotes too.

A week or so later, I was supposed to cover a Hunter/Jumper horse event for a national equestrian magazine. The event started on Tuesday or Wednesday and ran through the weekend. I went out to the event grounds and stopped at the office to get my credentials. The woman there was a bitch and more than a bit snotty. I put up with her giving me the run around about getting copies of results during the week for awhile and then finally decided it wasn't worth it.

"If coverage in ***insert national horse magazine here*** isn't worth a couple minutes of your time, then fuck you and your shitty event," I said. "I'm sure your sponsors and the event director will be pleased."

They weren't, but I didn't care. I called ProRodeo Sports News and asked if I could cover anything for them. They asked if I could go that weekend. I never looked back.

Along the way, I learned a lot and met some pretty cool people. One thing I learned is that these guys lead a tough life, but they wouldn't trade it in for the world. I also learned that cowboys really can be like comic book heros.

Here's a couple of examples:

*** I drove a beat-up Chevy pickup to the grounds. It was - to put it kindly - distinctive. It was also prone to having starter problems. At one rodeo, I had to replace the starter in the dirt at the grounds. A cowboy came over and gave me a hand without even knowing me. I saw him a few weeks later and he asked if the truck was okay. I bought him a beer and it was never mentioned again.

*** One year at Sisters, someone on the rodeo commitee (which I had joined by then) asked me to pick up a contestant at the little airport outside of town. That wasn't uncommon since most of the top cowboys tried to charter small planes if they could since they often had to travel pretty great distances between rodeos. I picked up the reigning world champion saddle bronc rider, Dan Mortensen, in my crapped-out Chevy. He grinned and hopped right in. Instead of bitching about the dirty ride, he pointed to some flies I had stuck to my dash.

"You fish?" he asked.

"A bit," I said. "I'm not very good."

He laughed and said, "Me either, but it sure is fun. I wish I had some time here. I hear there's good fishing around here."

He always gave me a nod when I saw him after that. Even at the National Finals Rodeo in Vegas.

*** Most rodeo grounds are split into two areas - the contestants' area and the rest of the grounds. I used to leave my camera bag sitting on the ground in the contestants' area all time. I never had any problems despite the fact that there were alway several lenses and bodies in there.

At one event, I came back to find -- well, nothing. My bag was gone. The rodeo was over and it was just some people milling around afterward. I felt sick. It was unbelievable that someone would just take it...that kind of thing never happened.

Just as I was about to lose it, a guy walks up and asks if I'm the camera guy. He then proceeds to tell me he moved my stuff into the announcer's booth so it wouldn't get hurt because he thought it might be expensive. I nearly kissed the guy...I stopped short of that and just thanked him.

*** In Bremerton, Washington, I had the great joy of having dinner with the then Miss Rodeo America. MiQuel Holyoak was one of the most beautiful girls around and she was spending some time between performances with me. I was in heaven.

Well, wouldn't you know...of course the starter on my truck went bad right after dinner. MiQuel sat up in the cab, peaceful as could be, reading a magazine and turning the ignition when I would yell up to her. Finally, it got going and I took her back to her motel to get changed for the evening show.

'Sorry about that," I said. "I hope this doesn't make you late."

Most girls wouldn't have been very impressed with the showing, but she just hopped out and grinned.

"I wasn't too worried. I knew you could get it started," she said laughing. "You know I love your truck, but next time...maybe I should drive."

Next time, she did drive...

Anyway, that's just a couple of reasons I have a thing for cowboys and - even more so - for cowgirls. I still miss that culture and wish the rest of the world was a bit more like it. Ah well...maybe someday.

Till then, Happy Trails...

Gettin' my ogle on...

I was all set to post about my peppy late afternoon... which was spent in my happy place (the mall) with two of my favorite things (pretty girls and books). I was in the neighborhood, so I stopped at Barnes and Noble and browsed the bookage for a while then headed into the mall.

Let's just say, some days are better than others and today was one of the better days. I wandered around with a big grin and nearly walked into several walls. I had my ogle on and life was ogletastic! I was rewarded with smiles in return and the Starbucks dude even hooked me up with a tasty triple grande mocha. In short, I was walking on Grade-A, high-octane sunshine...

That was then.

Now I feel like I went to Mexico and drank the water (and I have the trips to the bathroom to prove it). Oh how quickly we fall!

So, anyway here's a couple quick thoughts:

* Rain can feel pretty cool on your hand when you hold it (your hand that is) out the window while driving down the freeway.

* That same rain can sting like a son of a gun when the drops get big and hit your forearm...

* If you want to read some excellent writing, check out Waiter Rant at his old address, or his new address and also check out Laurie's blog. The Waiter is sometimes funny, sometimes thought provoking and always worth the time. Laurie manages to catch special moments and express them in a unusually poignant way. It just goes to show that the guy bringing your lunch or the girl cashing your check might just be artists at heart.

A and P

There's a short story by John Updike called "A&P" that seems to represent a recurring pattern in my life.

In it, Sammy (the 'hero') is a checker at an A&P grocery store in the middle of a little town where not much happens. It's late afternoon and three girls in bathing suits walk in, fresh from the beach. Sammy watches them out of the corner of his eye and ponders things.

They wander around and pick up a can of herrings and head to the check out. Sammy is just starting to help them when Lengel (the manager) walks over and lays into the girls for their inappropriate attire, saying that next time they need to have their shoulders covered. The scene gets uncomfortable and the air heavy with 'get these sluts out of here' vibes rippling off the manager. Sammy rings them up, hands them their change and then says to Lengel, "I quit."

There's a lot of layers to the story, but the gist is that at the end Sammy quit his job, the girls are gone and never knew he stood up for them, and Lengel is unchanged. Ever since I first read this story, I knew that I was Sammy. I will always believe that Lengel was wrong for embarrassing the girls. Maybe Sammy shouldn't have quit, but I respect him for doing it.

Anyway, this blog is my A&P and people stopping by is kind of cool. It's fun to chat and meet new people, to chew the fat and even to have some hearty debate. Most everyone seems pretty okay with that but lately there have been a couple of snarky comments and a tiff in the parking lot. I can't do much about what happens out in the parking lot, but I do have a say in what happens in my store. That said, anyone is welcome here and I don't care if you cover your shoulders, wear a two-piece bathing suit, or dance naked in the aisles.

Just keep in mind that I'm a Sammy and always will be...

Here's a link to John Updike's "A&P" for anyone interested. It's a quick read and worth a thought or two.

Finis... or finis enough

Okay, here she is... as done as she's gonna get by my hand. (It's too late to take that one back, so I'll keep my wicked, wicked thoughts locked up for now... And my friends would never go for a easy lob like that, right guys.)

Anyway, that was my fun for the day. That and putting in a handrail on my parent's back step. You just can't buy this kind of fun...

Which leaves the question of what to do tomorrow. Wow, there are just so many choices to make, it sort of hurts my head.

Finally...now I sort of get it

This has been the year of the geek for me. I've been trying to learn all things computer and there's a lot to learn.

One problem I have that adds to the learning curve is my short attention span. So, the oher day I decided that if I was to get anywhere with this learnin' thing, I would need to just pick one thing to work on during any given day. Easier said than done, but I did manage to put the new guidline into play a bit.

The outcome? I finally get Adobe Illustrator... a little. I know it's not much of a big deal to most people, but I've stared at this beast and have tried to learn it off and on for several years. Photoshop... not a problem. Quark Express... piece of cake. Illustrator... I don't have an effin clue. Well, I finally started to get it and it sort of makes sense.

Anyway, here's the fruit of the efforts so far... in all its rough draft glory. Obviously not done, but that wasn't really the point anyway. I just wanted to learn this bastard of a program so I could sit down and actually use it.

Anyway, I sometimes forget how much I like to learn stuff. Am I alone on this one?

I'm also pretty lucky because I can usually figure things out on my own and sort of prefer to do it that way. That's great now, but it really sucked back when I was in school because I always got bored.

Have you guys learned anything new lately? Do you like learning new stuff, or would you rather not have to? Just wondering...