Monday, August 22, 2005


In what can only be viewed as an epic confluence of events, I witnessed three annoying things simultaneously today. That doesn't happen very often - not even in Wisconsin.

I pulled into a spot at Goodwill, turned off the car and decided to finish off the McDonald's grub I had just bought at the nearby drive thru. (It was the Big-n-Tasty with cheese meal if you were wondering. And it was indeed tasty. And I had Coke to drink with that today.)

I'm sitting there enjoying the interplay of the mayo and ketchup with the fine American beef on a bun and in pulls a woman with a big "In Loving Memory Of..." sign on the back of her SUV. Normally, I wouldn't have noticed, except just the other day Slade had done a post on this very thing.

Then, just as I'm letting that slide off my back, a woman pulls into a not-spot in the middle of the lane in front of the store. Best of all there's an actual spot six feet away. Amazing.

She lets her fat buddy waddle out and into the store and then proceeds to stay right there with the engine running. Her windows are down and it's not hot enough to need the AC and she's not listening to the radio. Again...amazing. Listen lady, you're already driving a 12 MPG beast anyway, why not cut of the engine and let us all breath a bit while you're at it?

You might think I got mad about all this, but you would wrong on that one. No, I just enjoyed the hell out of my burger and thought to myself that maybe there really isn't any such thing as evolution...


Miranda said...

Mcdonalds makes everything right!

Josh said...

We could have a feisty debate over the consistency of bitching about American overconsumption in the form of SUV-driving while endorsing American overconsumption in the form of Big 'N' Tasty-eating.

But it would have to be a fairly detached debate, 'cause I had a Double Quarter Pounder meal for dinner last night. I had a Coke too.

And speaking of bumper stickers, what about those ones that say, "Beam me up, Scotty! There's no intelligent life down here!" I love Scottish people.

Slade said...

Shawn, that is too funny about the decal! I've only seen a few, but still find them greatly disturbing...I thought your comment on my blog was hilarious by the way. You always make me laugh.

I love a good ketchup/mayo combo myself.

thephoenixnyc said...

I think yo might get a kick out of

Jason said...

How long did it take Rome to fall?

The Zombieslayer said...

She just thinks the price of gas is too low so she's consuming more to ensure we continue to pay $3 a gallon (or at least that's what we pay here in Santa Barbara, CA).